Thursday, 28 November 2013

Phew... I hope?!

This isn't going to be long but just in case you don't follow the page on facebook I thought I'd better do a speedy update...

So it seems 'daughter number 2' isn't going to be any simpler or easier than 'daughter no 1'. I have A LOT of catching up and updating to do on here, I have been making notes as I think of things, so I hopefully won't forget anything. But here's a brief explanation:

'D#2' was 7 weeks old last Sunday... 

We spent a week in hospital being verbally abused by a pediatrician and struggling with her weight loss and me breastfeeding...
I managed to get us discharged by spending a night breastfeeding her every 2 hours, followed by 30 minutes double expressing breast milk and whilst I did that a nurse syringe fed her... She gained 50g overnight and they finallyyyy let us go on the Saturday (that was the Thursday night, the Friday night I had to do it myself! :/)
I then tried to continue breastfeeding for the next 2 weeks but she just wasn't gaining weight/ was losing weight at the weekend so I ended up supplementing with formula and 'combination feeding'...
So anyone who tells me breastfeeding a small baby is easy and don't bother clock watching/ worrying about positions/ worrying about if they're feeding ALL the time, please don't. I feel very strongly that how an individual feeds their baby is THEIR choice and there's a huge number of reasons often for someone making those choices!

Sooo that takes us up to about week 3: 
I think that was when I was still trying to decide whether to really attempt to breast feed solely, so I still felt VERY hormonal and emotional. I was trying to express breast milk - using advice from this site which I have had recommended and was utterly brilliant for anyone who's wondering (

Thennn I think it was the end of that week, IP got a nasty cold, DP got a nasty cough and I can't actually pinpoint when 'D#2' got said cold but at some point she did...
The week after I was trying desperately just to keep on top of things...
I *think* it was around that point that I firstly spent the day in hospital with severe stomach cramps, so DP, IP & 'D#2' just had to wait all day which was horrendous. The hospital, however, were fantastic. I won't go into great detail about why I was ill and my experience but it's resolved now (& the pain was on par with giving birth, incidentally). I came home that night and my parents happened to be visiting that weekend so we are very thankful because they were able to really look after us - my Dad bulk cooked, my Mum bottle fed 'D#2' & they all kept sending me and DP to bed to rest and entertained IP...

The week after I think D#2 just wasn't happy and I gave up breast feeding and put her on Transit formula - to help with constipation. (just remembered I also caught the cold around this point! :/) She was screaming whenever she needed a bottle so we thought had bad colic... By Sunday night we came to the conclusion that the Transit formula hadn't helped, she was due to see the Pediatrician on the Tuesday so we went back to 'normal' formula... 

And my goodness I noticed the difference then! She was really high pitched painfully screaming... Now people say do not google, and I did speak to a friend but she recommended a particular page and my instinct on googling was right, despite as DP said, the symptoms are normal 'living' symptoms:
D#2 has silent reflux... 
Then in the day between diagnosing she had silent reflux and her pediatrician appointment, I started to wonder if it was actually a cow's milk protein allergy

So we've had probably a week or so of the high pitched awful screaming - it's definitely very early considering I've read of babies having it for months. At the moment she is sort of comfort eating but also in a lot of pain when she eats. And she'll sleep for 5 hours but only sat upright on one of 'us'. I am absolutely exhausted as listening to a screaming baby in pain is not nice, only sleeping if I'm lucky for up to 5 hours and all the other stuff of course (keeping a house going and dealing with a toddler + other stuff...) 

I took D#2 to her pediatrician who instantly dismissed any thoughts of cow's milk protein allergy but prescribed for silent reflux. Today I took her to another pediatrician who has listened. So we are now playing 'the waiting game'... 


7/30. What is your dream job, and why?
Police officer. Too many reasons to list!

Wednesday, 27 November 2013


6/30. What is the hardest thing you have ever experienced?
My baby girl being in the SCBU.

Monday, 25 November 2013


5/30. What are the 5 things that make you most happy right now?
My little girl & husband. My cat. Munchkin. The support of those closest to me.

Sunday, 24 November 2013

Breaking News...

How would you define 'sleeping through the night'? Well, I have recently discovered the medical definition is 5 hours (I couldn't find anything specific more than this link). A baby sleeping through 5 hours straight (so it could be 7pm to midnight, or midnight to 5am etc) is classed as 'sleeping through'. So I was excited when 'the baby' slept through 5 hours solid two nights running! 

I am curious to see if she continues. Last night she finally fell asleep at 2am (THANK YOU DP!) but IP woke at 6:30am so we sadly didn't get the full benefit :( However it was fantastic that she managed that 5 hours because I realised today that up until now she's not settled at all and is 7 weeks old now! So for me that's 7 long weeks of exhaustion, the first week I think I got about 5 hours sleep in total, 3 of those hours probably the first night when nurses insisted they look after her so I could sleep... The second week wasn't much better, aside from DP being home. 

The third week we were told to supplement with formula and whilst I'm incredibly sad to have given up breastfeeding, I was in hospital all day last Friday with stomach cramps so the thought of breast feeding wasn't nice (we just about got through the day but it wasn't pleasant) and the next thing I knew I hadn't breast fed her for a few days. I will cover the whole situation in later posts but right now this moment I'm ok with it (yes, just ok) and most importantly, I want my sleep back and this is one way to get it (no I am not leaving her to cry, sleep training or anything else & yes technically I'm sure certain people I 'know' would say I've been selfish in not trying harder with the breast feeding, but other people have said 'happy mum = happy baby' and this mum was certainly not happy and neither was baby)! 

So we HOPE but we'll see, that this could be the start of something good! A beautiful family lol! ;P So I just wanted to share this very short post because I have been making notes when I've thought of things, it's just this time of year is always mega busy for me/ us in general so to have no sleep to survive on and a newborn to cope with... I may be writing Christmas posts in January at this rate, lol! ;)

^ this was taken a few weeks back!

Wednesday, 20 November 2013


4/30. List 10 things you would tell your 16 year-old self, if you could.
1. Exams are not the be all and end all.
2. Don't stress about your looks. You have to grow into your body to be happy with it.
3. Live in the moment. Life goes by WAY too fast. Enjoy all those moments in high school with your friends, as pretty soon you won’t see them as often and the ones who annoy you you probably won’t see again.
4. Appreciate everything you have. Though it might seem like your life is "rough," you've got it good.
5. It's okay to not get straight A’s. But it’s better to be able to say you put your all into it.
6. Be nicer to your family as those that are friends now may not be in the future.
7. Appreciate your hobbies as they may not always be there.
8. Pay attention in maths class! You’ll be so grateful for it later.
9. Spend more time with family members (especially your grandparents, cousins, etc.) One day you'll wake up and realize they won't always be there...

10. Don’t worry so much about boys. There’s a whole world of them waiting for you after school.

Sunday, 17 November 2013

Sundays photo...

I am writing this on my mobile, (during a 10 minute lay down) & can't format this any better at the moment (hence it is not silent) but this was taken about midnight last night...


Wednesday, 13 November 2013


3/30. Describe your relationship with your parents.
Ummmm. I'm pretty sure my dad reads my blog so... 

Update: 19/11/2013 My parents happened to be visiting the weekend just gone & were very helpful. My dad had prebulk cooked lots of meals for us to have in the freezer, they'd been to a UK shop to buy various things that are hard to buy here and then whilst they were here they sent me to bed to rest & entertained etc both kids... So although I would describe my relationship as fraught, because we're so similar, they're definitely there when I need them...

Monday, 11 November 2013


2/30. Describe 3 legitimate fears you have and explain how they became fears.
1 Not be able to breastfeed as long as I would like – I managed to express for IP for 7 days but I’ve never actually breastfed.
2 My children become scared of spiders because I am but there is nothing to be scared of.
3 Munchkin will arrive too early because IP arrived early.

Monday, 4 November 2013


1/30. List 20 random facts about yourself.
1. I started at my local Brownie unit when I was 7 years old and have been involved in Guiding, particularly to make new friends in a new area… IP came to Rainbows with me until recently.
2. IP is named after ‘Royal Bra’ as my husband’s ex colleague said. Ironic as it’s a bra brand I wear and I have always wanted to call my daughter Catherine growing up but never thought it would happen! Nothing to do with the Duchess of Cambridge! ;)
3. When I was younger we lived in the middle of nowhere and I was a massive bookworm as a result. We had one trip to the library a week and that was about it. These days I’ve struggled to find time to read. Hopefully that’ll change soon!
4. I have been with my husband for 10 years, this last January but we only got married in July 2010.
5. I was born on 18/11/83 at 8:08am. I guess 8 is a good number for me!?
6. I am trying to cut down my tv addiction…
7. Je suis fille unique – I am an only child. So it’s a bit mental for me that my husband is the oldest of 4 children!
8. Growing up I desperately wanted to act as a copper in ‘The Bill’. Then they axed The Bill and I decided being a Police Officer was good. Then I made it to PCSO but then we moved to Luxembourg so that dream will have to wait. 
9. One of the only things I can honestly say I know I am better than my husband at is swimming. I’m competitive! ;) I loved swimming and did a few ‘badges’. So when my daughter was born I was determined she’d start swimming lessons as soon as possible. I’ve interviewed and considered working for the same company as a swimming instructor.
10. I don’t drink enough water and really need to improve at it. I never have drunk enough water…
11. I am trying to be minimalist but I have a feeling cute baby clothes will be hard, as we have a lot of baby girl clothing!
12. I wanted to go double barrelled in surname when I got married. But then I decided to go with my husband’s surname as it cost more and was harder to go double barrelled. I used my maiden name at work (for security). I used an alias on facebook. And then we moved to Luxembourg and here they all use maiden names. So I like it!
13. I must be one of the few people who genuinely really just isn’t that fussed with music. I listened to it when I was at school but now I just don’t think about it…
14. I was raised to try a bit of everything food wise. (I wrote these a while ago)
15. We don’t know what gender Munchkin is but we have plenty of girl’s names… And are struggling with boys! ;/
16. I am trying to wean myself off certain media ;)
17. I have never understood the attraction or addiction of pinterest. I’m kinda hoping to keep it that way as there was a time I felt that way about facebook…
18. I cannot cook. I literally only started cooking regularly because I was at home when our daughter turned 6 months. Now I do Monday – Thursday, DP does Friday – Sunday because he actually enjoys cooking.
19. When I say I can’t cook: I have burnt pasta!

20. I wish I had a darker, Mediterranean look. I’ve got brown hair and eyes but not the med look, sadly :/